Why This Chinese Mother Thinks She is Superior, but is Just Like the Rest of Us More Than She Realizes

Rant alert! Rant alert! Not even sure where to begin on this one. I just about spit out my coffee when I came across this article in the Wall Street Journal this morning. Normally I don't touch that boring ass publication with a 10 foot pole, but I happened to notice a headline about it on my husband's copy as I was bringing it in from outside. WOW. Let me just tell you that I couldn't believe what I was reading. What really rubbed me the wrong way wasn't so much the author's parenting methodology, although I did find many of her practices to be disturbing and even diabolical. No sleepovers, playdates or acting in school plays (GOD FORBID), no playing any musical instrument except the piano or violin, and NO A-minuses or anything below that either, or else!! Gee, I'm glad I didn't grow up in her house. The author's frequent use of stereotypes and snarky jabs at "Western" parenting methods was annoying too, along with the general condescending tone of the piece. However, I was especially taken aback by the author's quote that "the vast majority of the Chinese mothers said that they believe their children can be "the best" students, that "academic achievement reflects successful parenting," and that if children did not excel at school then there was "a problem" and parents "were not doing their job."" Oh really? Let's analyze this. Sounds to me like a problem child is indicative of a problem parent in Chinese society, and vice versa, at least according to the author. Do I smell MOMMY COMPETITION here? My child is smarter than yours. My child played the piano at Carnegie Hall. My child did X, Y or Z, and it's all because of my robust, no-nonsense leadership qualities as a MOM. Sounds a lot like AMERICAN parents!! Come on, people. We all do it to some degree, although hopefully we aren't anywhere near as rabid or annoying as the woman who wrote this article. We all compare our children (and hence, our parenting) with other children and subconsciously measure them (and, hence, ourselves) up. It doesn't have to be about academics or music. It's just what we do as parents, whether we realize it or not. The reason this author became so incensed with the fact that her daughter couldn't play a piano piece is because she felt that the daughter's failure to master the song was reflective of her skills as a parent. Haven't we all been embarrassed by our children at one point or another? Haven't we all wondered if something "bad" they did or didn't do was a result of something WE did or didn't do? And haven't we felt like taking the credit when they did something good? Take a pill, lady. You're more "Western" than you think.